Author Topic: Lets Laugh a Bit...!  (Read 4794 times)

Offline Shamim Ansary

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Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« on: June 26, 2011, 11:23:24 PM »
A little girl came home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."

The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this ... by the way, what was it that you didn't do?"

The little girl replied, "My homework."
« Last Edit: June 26, 2011, 11:53:21 PM by Shamim Ansary »
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #1 on: June 26, 2011, 11:26:59 PM »
TEACHER : What is an island ?

Pupil   : A piece of land surrounded by water except on one side.

TEACHER :On one side ?

Pupil   : Yes, on top !
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #2 on: June 26, 2011, 11:29:13 PM »
Parent : Why does you geography exam have a big zero over it.

Pupil   : It's not a zero, the teacher ran out of stars, so she gave me a moon instead !
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #3 on: June 26, 2011, 11:30:12 PM »
TEACHER  : I want you to tell me the longest sentence you can think of

Pupil   : Life imprisonment !
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #4 on: June 26, 2011, 11:32:09 PM »
TEACHER : Name four members of the cat family

Pupil   : Daddy cat, mummy cat and two kittens !
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #5 on: June 26, 2011, 11:33:59 PM »
Q: Why were the early days of history called the dark ages?

A: Because there were so many knights!
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #6 on: June 26, 2011, 11:35:38 PM »
Q: Why does history keep repeating itself?

A: Because we weren't listening the first time!
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #7 on: June 26, 2011, 11:36:58 PM »
How do you spell Hard Water with 3 letters?

ICE!
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #8 on: June 26, 2011, 11:38:30 PM »
Why did Jenifer take a ruler to bed?

Because she wanted to see how long she slept!
 
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #9 on: June 26, 2011, 11:41:49 PM »
A man in a hurry taking his eight-year-old son to school made a turn at a red light where it was prohibited.

"Uh-oh, I think I just made an illegal turn!" the man said.

"It's okay, Dad," the boy said, "The police car right behind us did the same thing."
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #10 on: June 26, 2011, 11:42:48 PM »
"Isn't the principal a dummy!" said a boy to a girl.

"Well, do you know who I am?" asked the girl.

"No." replied the boy.

"I'm the principal's daughter." said the girl.

"And do you know who I am?" asked the boy.

"No," she replied.

"Thank goodness!" said the boy with a sign of relief.
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #11 on: June 26, 2011, 11:44:39 PM »
Little Raju wasn't getting good marks in school. One day he surprised the teacher with an announcement. He tapped her on the shoulder and said, "I don't want to scare you, but my daddy says if I don't start getting better grades, somebody is going to get a spanking!"
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #12 on: June 26, 2011, 11:45:35 PM »
The child comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks, "What did you learn today?"

The kid replies, "Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow."
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #13 on: June 26, 2011, 11:46:25 PM »
The teacher of the earth science class was lecturing on map reading.

After explaining about latitude, longitude, degrees and minutes the teacher asked, "Suppose I asked you to meet me for lunch at 23 degrees, 4 minutes north latitude and 45 degrees, 15 minutes east longitude...?"

After a confused silence, a voice volunteered, "I guess you'd be eating alone."
« Last Edit: June 26, 2011, 11:49:03 PM by Shamim Ansary »
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087


Offline Shamim Ansary

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Re: Lets Laugh a Bit...!
« Reply #14 on: June 26, 2011, 11:47:55 PM »
Teacher: Why are you late, Joseph?

Rana: Because of a sign down the road.

Teacher: What does a sign have to do with your being late?

Rana: The sign said, "School Ahead, Go Slow!"
"It is not too late to seek a newer world
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield."

Shamim Ansary
01713493087